Maybe it has something to do with having lost my father at a young age but I live too much of my life worrying that something horrible is going to happen to someone I love. Why do I do this to myself? I don’t know how my stomach isn’t lined with ulcers. ; ) Even thinking of leaving my kids for a couple nights with my mom I will have visions of earthquakes and fires. At times my worrying isn’t even to a normal degree. haha! Like the kids will miss me and be sad when they fall asleep. I am picturing crazy scenarios including my house turned upside down. At least I still have some imagination left.
But just now as I look at these photos from today of Myles on his birthday I had a moment where I thought, “See everything is going to be ok!” Reminding myself to enjoy the now and stop thinking about what could happen. Because crappy stuff is going to happen… most of which is out of my control. So shouldn’t I just love what’s happening now? Yes, yes I should.
Recently my dear friend Heather’s husband was in a horrible snowboarding accident. A really bad one that fractured his spine and pelvic bone. At first they probably were thinking why did this happen? Then at the hospital a nurse recommended a CT scan to see if his head was ok… and they found cancer. Malignant cancer that was spreading. They would’ve never known about it if he hadn’t gotten in that snowboarding accident. It reminds me that God has a plan for each of us. Do I wish that my plan included nothing ever happening to the people in my life that I love so dear again? Yes. It sucks. I miss my dad. But I also know that I will see him again. When I replace my worry with faith I can breathe easy again.
Thanks for listening to my crazy thoughts. Collin just took all the girls somewhere while Myles’s naps and I had a free, quiet minute to think. Life is hard and spectacular and full of light all at once.
Final statement & pep talk for myself– Enjoy the now dang it!
Stop worry by questioning the worried thought:
- What’s the evidence that the thought is true? That it’s not true?
- Is there a more positive, realistic way of looking at the situation?
- What’s the probability that what I’m scared of will actually happen?
- If the probability is low, what are some more likely outcomes?
- Is the thought helpful? How will worrying about it help me and how will it hurt me?
- What would I say to a friend who had this worry?
Some quotes I found that really made me stop and smack myself in the face for being a worry-freak:
| Worrying does not empty tomorrow of it’s troubles. It empties today of its strength.
| Most of the things you worry about never even happen.
| Worry implies that we don’t quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough or loving enough to take care of what’s happening in our lives. Francis Chan
| If I could get paid to worry, I’d have a full time job. T Hall
| No amount of worry can solve any problem.
| Worry ends where faith in God begins.
| I’ve got 99 problems and 86 of them are completely made up scenarios in my head that I am stressing about for no logical reason.
| You will be fine. Just you wait and see.