And Thus Beginneth Year 31


I met you when you were 15, which means I have officially known you for more than half of your life. You were just an awkwardly skinny freshman with bangs even Kelly Kapowski could envy. I, the bad-skin big-head/tiny clear-braces sophomore wearing 4 undershirts just to look bigger. No doubt I said something really charming the first time we met, probably something like “Hey I like your boon-doggles” or “You got any Carmex?” Is it awesome that I’ve know you more than half your life? Do I feel lucky, punk? I pay Clint Eastwood to ask me that everyday at gunpoint, to which I always reply “Yes sir!” (then change into a clean pair of undershorts)

This past year is in the books. It was a year of happiness, growth, learning, and realizing that you are in fact stuck with me for good. I’m like a stinky dread-locked white guy playing the bongos living in a tent at Β Occupy Wallstreet…I ‘aint going anywhere.

Avery is sitting next to me trying to wrap the picture she drew you for your birthday with cardstock and washi tape, using scissors like a boss. She’s just like her mama. Always making things with her hands. Quincey just walked in wearing your fedora, sucking her thumb and said, “Daddy, someone is making a very mess!” Lola just walked in by my side, said “Mah! Is dis ah duh” with her curly hair and goose-egg on her forehead (battle wound from Disneyland). I see you in all of them. Creative, cuddle-loving, headstrong 1/16th Greek children. They are all mini-Liz’s and I love that. Crap now they’re all fighting because Quincey just said “Daddy can we eat some food and go to Disneyland?” Avery: “Quincey we already WENT to Disneyland!” and now they are wrestling lemme break it up brb.Β Okay. Just peeked in the family room and Lola scattered raisins everywhere and took her diaper off (so some of those aren’t raisins) time to wrap this up.

Happy Birthday to the mother of my children, the eater of my french toast, the courtesy-laugher of my jokes, the tag-teamer of our time-out enforcing, the love of my life.

Oh, and for your birthday I’m buying something I found on Craigslist from a guy named “Amir” so if I don’t come back after driving to meet him this morning and there’s a statewide search for me, save time by skipping the tennis courts.

Love, Collin

48 thoughts on “And Thus Beginneth Year 31

  1. Msluffa

    This made my heart melt. What a sweet thing to do and say.
    Clearly there’s love flowing through the pen.
    Happy birthday! I wish you more love.

  2. Tiffany

    Collin has the best birthday posts. Happy birthday Liz! I hope you enjoy your day and you get to relax….or shop a lot πŸ˜‰ (same thing right?)

  3. Amber LafataPchoochie

    Happy Birthday Liz!!! And Collin you make me laugh every time your hack her blog…I love it!

  4. Bea Monforte

    This post was just beautiful <3

    Happy birthday Liz and welcome to the 31! (I'm turning 32 in august), remember all your readers love you and your cute family πŸ˜€

    Xoxoxo, Bea

  5. Natalie Winterstein

    You two are so cute and such a riot! πŸ™‚ Happy Birthday Liz – have a rockin’ good time!

  6. SandraA

    Happy birthday! Great message, Collin. I hope you cleared up all the “raisins”. Enjoy your day.

  7. Kristen Howard

    I stared at that first sentance for a good 5 minutes trying to figure out what you were talking about….then I moved past it & realized Collin was writing. πŸ™‚ I’m a little slow.
    Hope you have a very happy birthday and a fabulous 31st year ahead!!

  8. Kim Woods

    You always have the exact right thing to say! Yes, 3 kids is monumentally more than 2! Happy Birthday to your sweet wife, you have a beautiful family that makes me smile πŸ™‚

  9. Nicole

    I’m laughing so hard at your hubby’s birthday post. it’s very hilarious and sweet all in one. i hope you have a great birthday!

  10. Dao

    Happy 31 Liz! I hope I look as amazing as you when I turn 30! Thank you so much for all the inspiration pixie dust you’ve thrown my way. You truly are an amazing person. I’m sure that not a day goes by that you don’t hear that. πŸ˜‰

    MAY babies rule. I am biased. But they totally rock. I hope you have a magically sparkly day!

  11. sophie

    joyeux anniversaire Lizz!! you are so lucky to have such a man to care for you!! happy happy BDAY!!!! you bring so much beauty to my world!! thank God for making you!!

  12. Iina

    You guys are so amazing and this was like the cutest post ever, awww <3 (the raisin part really made me LOL). Have a happy happy birthday, Liz! I love your blog!

  13. Carole

    I am sure now, Collin IS Superman !!!! The real !!! Not the fake !

    Happy Birthday Lizzy, and now I am super jaleouse, You have 10 years less than me.. I hate you for the next 10 year… πŸ™‚
    Seriously, you have a really good life and I’m sure you are the most lucky girl in the world !

    To finish, If I can give you an advice : change your password ! hahaahhahh !!!

  14. gina f.

    Happy Birthday Liz!!! Collin, you definitely have a way with words! I will never look at another raisin again without hearing your story play in my head!

  15. karenladd

    Happy happy birthday Liz!! Sheesh…I can’t stop giggling after I read that post from Colin! My first introduction to this blog was when Colin was posting for you (can’t remember why he had to do that..but you were indisposed somehow) and he requested that readers make up haiku. His posts cracked me up then, and they do now! You and your energetic brood are so lucky to have each other…but I know you realize that, just from reading your blog! Have a wonderful day celebrating your birthday!

  16. Sally Goowin

    Happy Birthday from across the pond, what a wonderful message from your Husband, it made me smile, I think he may be a keeper

  17. laurie lariviere

    Happy Birthday Liz…I think you already have the best present ever, that hilarious hubby of yours!! and those three beyond gorgeous children, what more you could ask for, lucky lady indeed πŸ™‚

  18. Dawnie

    playing catch-up w/the Dear Lizzy blog (had no idea it had been THAT long since I checked in on you guys!) – I think this is the last one I read before MY hiatus (life does get in the way) so this may be a double post for me. I have been reading you for years, Dear Lizzy (haha), and you never cease to make me smile. Many years ago, before we could subscribe (or maybe before I could figure out how to subscribe), I stumbled upon this blog on an earlier birthday. Collin had hijacked your blog then, too (I think it’s an annual ritual, yes?) and as I read back & caught up w/your lives, I was immediately smitten! I really do feel like I know you personally. I find you inspiring & touching & inventive. I say this all the time: I wanna be just like you when I grow up! (except I am already much, much older than you)


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